Agent N

Naked Lunch (film)

I’m lying in bed, bundled up like an Eskimo baby, popping vitamin C like popcorn. I was bored so I erased the word “fucking” from yesterday’s entry, so I could relocate it here. I have a tight budget for naughty words. Why? ‘Cause I’m a motherf*#in’ lady.

I’ve been thinking about this girl I knew once… She was in one of my writing classes in college. And while we’re on the subject of bad words, she was the cutest lil potty-mouth I’ve ever met. All her stories were about masturbation, introverted sexual exploits, dirty dirty things. Always a pleasure to read.

I wish I could remember her name. If I hadn’t been going through one of my lonely martyr phases, I think we could have been best friends. I wonder if she’s changed, if she’s a mom now. Maybe she became a badass novelist. Maybe she trains horses. I wonder if she likes waffles. I like waffles. The only thing I really remember about her is that Naked Lunch was her favorite book. Until I know more, I’ll refer to her as Agent N.

So here’s to Agent N and all the clever potty-mouth women of the world. Thanks for all your filthy wisdom, and your cool vision. If you’re listening, please send your good vibes so I can be healthy enough to raise a glass to you tonight. The last day of the year starts at midnight. The clock ticks. Please hurry.

Share your thoughts.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: