The Company of Books

Keith Haring

Keith Haring (Photo credit: Simonetta Di Zanutto)

I’ve just come up for air after completing a few major projects over the previous weeks. Yesterday was an especially difficult day, and now I sit here resurrected turning to the words in Keith Haring’s journals for new breath.

I am comforted by written words. The very nature of their existence is sweet to me: that they are there… In order. In print. For me to see, for you to see. Plain evidence of thought.

I’ve felt a little isolated the past few days. The wave hit me strong, possibly because I am not completely accustomed to the culture that surrounds me. Or perhaps it is the culture that is just not accustomed to me. I guess that’s normal. I’ve never really been accustomed anywhere, but I feel a little homesick, even though I am supposedly “home.” It’s something I struggle with–the concept of home. Fiona Apple’s words come to mind: “Home is where my habits have a habitat.” I think that home is somewhere inside of me. People peek through the windows when the curtains are drawn. Few have their own key.

Miami is a very emotional city and sometimes it seems I can’t do a darn thing without upsetting the natural order of someone’s life. It’s too much responsibility and at the same time, utter nonsense. It puzzles me, but it happens often, so I’ve stopped caring. I combat this frustration by seeking the company of books. It’s the only thing that makes sense today. A few hours ago I felt like a freak, and now I find comfort in a passage written 35 years ago.

Haring writes:
I am me. I may look like you, but if you take a closer look you will realize that I am nothing like you at all. I am very different. I see things through a completely different perspective because in my life I had experiences that you didn’t have, and I’ve lived places and seen places and experienced life from a completely different point of view than you have. I may be wearing the same shoes and the same haircut, but that gives you no right to have any preconceived notions about what I am or who I am.

You don’t even know me.
You never will.

2 Responses to “The Company of Books”

  1. I just met you and from now I will always know more about you today than I did yesterday, but since I will never fully know myself I will never know you. I’m fine with that. It’s the effort that reveals. As you wander about my heart I feel you more than I know you. I’m fine with that too. Getting to know you is like mining for gold and I already feel rich. Thank you Star : )

    • !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wow. Thank you. It’s such a great feeling to read these words. Really.

      Sometimes I feel so exhausted when people won’t understand that you don’t have to understand. I am me. You are you. Only we know how to be the best we that we can be.

      As we connect, we uncover a little more. Discover things not everyone can see. And this process… this process… this process… that is the real gold.

      It was superb meeting you. 😀

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